What People’s Behavior Has Taught Me

You know what’s been on my mind lately?

People’s behavior.

Not what they say.

Their behavior.

I’ve realized you can learn more about a person by watching how they treat other people than by listening to what they say about themselves.

Someone can tell you they’re a good person all day long.

But then they spend hours talking about someone’s else’s life.

someone can tell you they love their family.

But they’re constantly trying to embarrass, compete with, or tear down the very people they’re connected to.

That doesn’t make sense to me.

I don’t know…

Maybe I’ve just reached a point where I look at people differently.

I find myself asking questions.

What makes someone else’s happiness bother them?

Why do some people always need someone to blame, someone to criticize, or someone to carry the weight of their frustration?

I don’t have all the answers.

But I do know this…

People who are content don’t usually spend their time trying to make other people miserable.

They have their own lives to live.

Their own families to pour into.

Their own peace to protect.

And that’s something I’ve been paying attention to.

Not because I’m trying to judge people.

Because behavior leaves clues.

Sometimes people will tell you exactly who they are without realizing it.

With the way they treat people they don’t agree with.

With the way they speak about someone’s else’s life who isn’t there to defend themselves.

With the way they react when something good happens for someone else.

You can’t fake that forever.

Eventually, whatever is living inside of us finds its way out.

Maybe that’s why I don’t spend so much time trying to explain myself anymore.

I’ve spent enough time observing people’s behavior to realize that words can say one thing while actions say another.

You can learn a lot about someone by the way they treat people.

By what they celebrate.

By what bothers them.

By how they respond when life doesn’t go their way.

By how they speak about people who aren’t in the room.

Behavior has a way of telling the truth long before people are ready to.

Sometimes the closure we’re looking for isn’t found in a conversation.

It’s found in someone’s repeated behavior.

Some things don’t make sense until you’ve lived them.

If this resonated with you,

you already know why.

— Abi Brooklyn